Awoke to a noise. Maybe not a real noise, quite possibly within a dream but there was a startle nonetheless. The dogs weren’t aroused, only us humans. I wandered upstairs to investigate with no weapon except for my clenched fist and a sore lower back.
Nothing, as suspected.
It wasn’t even me that heard it, it was my wife. Minutes later, back in bed, she is breathing heavy in sleep and I’m wide-eyed. Back upstairs I go, but this time to kill away the hours until I can relax again. I crack a beer, because why not, open up the iPad and begin to draw.
I both hate being awake in the middle of the night and secretly love the quiet and alone. The thought of self-reflection terrifies me but when there’s nothing more to do than listen to unfamiliar music and doodle the time away allowing thoughts to materialize and quickly disappear, I suppose this fleeting level of distracted reflection is good enough.
Basically there just a lot of self-loathing going on. Ahh well.